Thirsty?

I am sitting here in the desert...with the blazing hot sun beating down on me. My mouth is parched...I have tasted the water once, a long time ago...and now I am only left with memories of the sweet, blissful liquid passing over my tongue. As I look around for something to quench my thirst, I only find dry, parched sand...also too wanting to swallow up any remnant of moisture. I look up to the sky, as tears form in my eyes...the longing in me to once again taste the living water consumes me...why did I come to the desert? What made me think that I could do it on my own? The impossibility of turning this wasteland into an oasis is daunting. And how could I think that would be possible by just bringing a cup of water from the River? My obvious failure stares me in the face as the wind thrusts tiny grains of sand against my face. I hadn't been here but a month and I had already consumed the cup of water...and now I am worse than when I first came. I glance at my cup. It is simply made from clay and therefore quite despised by some. But I like it...somehow, it almost seems like it is a part of me. I used this object to drink from the River. Fond memories of that season fill my mind....I long to be there again, by the River, wading on it's banks with My Love; having fun playing on the shore. My Love. Most certainly He'll help me! Maybe if I find Him, He'll fill my cup again. Oh, I'll do anything to just have some of that water! I will try to listen to Him....perhaps then I'll know where to find Him. I quiet my thoughts and listen for my Love's voice. Oh! I hear Him....I hear Him calling my name! He is telling me to come to Him!! I somehow manage to stand up – amidst my weakness – and stumble towards His voice. It leads me away from this dry desert land. As I continue towards the sound of His voice, the weight of my cup causes me to once again remember the sweet memories of water. I wonder if He'll scold me for trying to change this wasteland by myself? For trying to do it without Him. His voice leads me to a waterfall....but I don't see Him anywhere. I have never seen such a massive waterfall before! How could I have not seen this before? Why would He lead me here? I wonder where He is? Oh! I can hear His voice..it's calling to me from behind the wall of water. As I timidly inch my way towards the waterfall, my grasp tightens around my cup. When I finally arrive at the base of the waterfall, I haltingly extend my cup towards the voice of my Love. I hope He will fill it. I hope he will still love me. I clench my eyes shut as I brace myself for the worst. Suddenly, I hear His voice whisper right in my ear, “It's all for you.” His voice makes me jump. In my moments of contemplation, He must have walked beside me. He is so close to me, His breath tickles my ear. Waves of peace wash over me as He says, “I love you, and I always will.” As He walks towards the cascading water, He beckons me to come with Him. I look at Him questioningly and point towards my cup. He bursts out laughing – the most joyous laugh I have ever heard – and says with a smile, “My darling, you don't need that anymore....this is all for you!” The understanding of what He just said, fills my heart with joy. In my excitement, I drop my cup and race towards my Love. The water splashes all around me as I joyfully bounce towards Him. He takes my hand and leads me right into the stream of water. As I throw my head back and drink deeply of the clear, pure water, I am invigorated with it's freshness. My Love is watching me with the most adoring look I have ever seen. As the water pounds on my head and cascades down my whole body, I burst out laughing. Why did I ever doubt His love? Why did I ever doubt that He would give me more than I could dream of? He is so good! He is the epitome of love. He is love. As our eyes meet, a mischievous grin spreads across His face and He takes my hand and starts dancing. We spin and twirl, leap and laugh. After what must have been hours of this, we sat down on a boulder and I just enjoyed snuggling next to Him. He pointed to the base of the waterfall and said, “Look over there, my darling. See the rainbow? That is a sign of my love for you. I will always provide for you, I will always fill you. I long for us to have this much fun every day.” I stare at the rainbow, with it's majestic colors sparkling. “If you try to do things on your own, you will fail. But together, we will bring my love, my River to the desert places. It's gonna be done by you resting in Me, letting yourself by held by Me – just like you're doing right now.” I am filled with the knowledge of just how much He loves me. I am His. He will provide for me. He will change the desert. I don't have to try to make something happen, all I've gotta do is let myself be held in His embrace. And that is the sweetest place!

Icy Roads and Snowflakes

The last couple weeks, we've had relatively warm temperatures here in Canada (for our winter) but the past few days, temperatures have dropped by 10 or 20 degrees (Celsius) and therefore we've had a bit of fog due to the sudden change in temperature...this caused hoarfrost to develop on the trees and any other free-standing object. The sight of this is absolutely stunning...and makes me so thankful that I get the privilege of seeing the beauty in God's creation.

We had freezing rain last night, making the roads quite icy...but even so, I decided to visit some friends that live an hour's drive away. As I was driving home this evening, the clouds slowly disappeared, revealing a very bright moon. It illuminated the snowy landscape around me, and made the icy road appear as brilliant as glass. The stars sparkled overhead, and the brilliance of the moon caused a bubbly feeling to well within me. Later in the drive, it became cloudy again, and tiny snowflakes gently began to fall down...they created a thin white layer on the road....making it appear from a distance like a fine dusting of icing sugar...but from up close, each little snowflake sparkled like tiny diamonds in my headlights.....the sight really brought joy to my heart, and I couldn't help but gaze into Love's eyes and thank Him for His wonderful creation.

May Long Weekend

Well...I haven't posted anything in a couple months. It's kinda crazy how time slips by, often without us noticing. We can so easily get caught up in our busy lives that we don't take time to slow down and just enjoy the moments as they are passing. It's the May long weekend here in Canada and alot of people are camping and/or hanging out with family and friends. I would have liked to get out and do something exciting like that, but, due to circumstances, I didn't. Self-pity was knockin' at my door, tryin' to get me to feel sorry for myself. But instead, I just kinda 'chilled', trying my best to relax; and in that quite place, I could feel God wooing me, and this morning I had some really good reflection time with God. Life has been so fast-paced lately that I really havn't taken that time to enjoy all the little things, to revel in the beauty that God has placed all around me. I've had that opportunity this weekend, the time to think, ponder and just simply enjoy the simple things in life.
I sat on the deck with my Love, just listening to the early morning sounds. It was beautiful - pure bliss, actually - to bask in His presence and enjoy His creation with Him. Feeling the brisk morning breeze caressing my face as the pure, unadulterated sunlight washed me in warmth. Hearing the magpies and crows beckon their feathered friends to join them in their 'joyful noise to the Lord', the excited early morning chatter of care-free sparrows, and the hopeful song of humble robins fill the air. The invigorating smell of earth coming alive in Spring filled my senses. It really was a beautiful time. It's at times like these that you wish you could just 'pause' life and stay in that place. But that's not how life works, we are to keep moving forward, not stay camped in one place. And when we choose to keep moving forward - regardless of how painful it may be to walk in that path chosen for us - the wonderful thing is that God will reward us with marvelous things that we've not even dreamed of. Yes, it may be painful to be grown and stretched, but it is because of that stretching that we are then able to Love in a greater capacity.

My Adventures - Mozambique Mission Trip 2009 Slideshow

Well, I've finally put together a slideshow of my trip to Africa and posted it on YouTube.

My Adventures - Mozambique Mission Trip 2009 (pt. 4)

On Sunday, we flew up to Pemba to visit the Iris Ministries' Base there (where we spent 3 days). One thing we noticed as soon as we stepped off the plane was the muggy heat. We thought Maputo was hot, well it was at least 10 degrees hotter in Pemba. (It was about 30 degrees Celcius in Maputo and 40 with 100% humidity in Pemba.) But, even though it was hot, it was absolutely beautiful! The Pemba base is right across the road from the Indian Ocean - so you have a grandiose view, especially from the top of the property where the elementary school and village feeding area is. I spent the first evening here with the children at the baby house, just singing songs together and playing games. The next morning, we were given orientation and some backround on the culture and mission work in the area. Some things were shocking to hear, things that we take for granted in our western culture, yet most don't have there. For example, most children there have never seen a mirror -the first time they saw them at Iris Ministries they would stare at themselves in awe, they'd never seen what they looked like before. Also, most of the children in the community only have one meal a day or every other day. One of the ministries at the Pemba base is called "Village Feeding" where they give the village children food every day at lunch-time.

That afternoon, we joined the whole base (including the school children) for one of their church services. Once again, we were surrounded by children who were just happy to sit with us and during worship, we saw them dancing and singing with joy to their God. It was all in Portuguese, so we couldn't understand what they were singing, but just seeing their passion for God and their heart of worship made you desire to have that same fire for God.

We also got the honor of participating in the Village Feeding two of the afternoons we were there. They open up the gates to the village and the children come running into the base, racing to the tent where they sit and are taught the Bible, sing songs, and play games before they are fed.
There were about 300 - 500 children on the days we were there, but I was told that the most they'd ever had was 700. There's not really enough room for all those children in the tent, which is why they are working on constructing a building for this ministry. On one of the days we were there, we did a short skit for the children about the Good Samaritan while the man who was teaching narrorated it in Portuguese.

After the lesson and songs, the children filed out of the tent and are each given a plate of rice with a topping (beans or greens). As I was handing out the plates of food, I was struck with the fact that this was probably the only meal these children would be getting that day, and it almost brought me to tears thinking about it. Even though these children were probably ravonously hungry, some of the older ones would help the younger ones and make sure they had food before they ate. Such a contrast to our Western Culture! Seeing all this and helping them was a very touching experience for me.


Later that day, I had an opportunity, once again, to go pray for people in the hospital, and I was talking to God about it. I felt that I should go, yet I think I was trying to perhaps talk Him out of it, maybe I could just hang out with the children again. But I didn't feel at peace at all about staying back. It seemed like God was saying, "I'm giving you the opportunity to do both - you hung out with the children at Maputo, and now I want you to go to the hospital." Again, He reminded me that when I am weak, He is strong. It was then that I knew that I was going, regardless if anybody else from our team went. I didn't know if I was going to see results from my prayers for the people, but what really mattered was that I obeyed God. My job was simply to go to the hospital and love those people, be God's Love to them.
As it turned out, most of our team went. Before we left, we spent time praying as a group (whoever was going to minister at the hospital). When we were at the hospital, we prayed for many people and I felt such love for them. The hospital was very different from a Canadian one, it wasn't as clean and sanitary, and their ways of doing things are quite different. The sights and smells would perhaps, under normal circumstances, cause one to cringe (at the very least). But I felt so much love for these people, that it didn't bother me. I just desired for them to see the goodness of God and I do believe that they will see the miracle-working power of God. The guy who leads the hospital ministry (and also translated for us) had such a passion for God and the joy of the Lord was very evident on Him. I was very blessed by his fire for God and love for his people.

I spent one of the evenings in the girls' dorm visiting with them and playing games. Some of the older girls and Tias (dorm leaders) knew English, so I was able to converse with them. I had alot of fun getting to know them.
As it was getting close to their bedtime, they had a time of worship and praise. With dancing and singing, they worshipped their Maker, joyful for what He had rescued them from, and they either fell on their faces before Him or lifted their gaze to their God, in complete adoration of Him. I was so overwhelmed with the presence of God in that room! And I was so impacted by how they praised God with total abandon, even the young girls. They all had such beautiful voices and their eyes were closed, their faces looking to God in total worship and adoration to Him. It was at this point that I began to feel incredibly heartbroken at the thought of having to leave this beautiful country and beautiful people filled with God's presence.

The next morning, we went to the village of Mieze to see the work that God is doing there. A couple from Prince Edward Island has been missionaries there for, I think, the past 4 years. As soon as we arrived, the children were happy to see us and the young ones just wanted to be held.

We were given a tour around the base they have built and were told stories of what God is doing there. They are also building a new church so they can minister to more people. Right now, they are using a small dirt floor building for their meetings and they have only told a portion of the community for lack of more space, but once the new church is finished, they will be able to minister to the rest of the people in the area.


The last day that we were there, we were able to just spend time with the people - I spent some more time with one of the girls I met and got to know her a little more. Her passion and fire for God was such a blessing, and it was evident that she spent alot of time in God's presence. I am really glad that I had the priveledge of meeting her. I was really sad that I was leaving and wished that I could just stay. We helped at the Village Feeding one more time before we left. At the end of the teaching, the children prayed for us before we left. Seeing the tent full of children with their hands stretched out towards us was very moving for me. The same thing happened when we were at Mieze when the children prayed for us - I just felt the power of God so strongly. There's really no words to describe it, but the tangible presence of God fell on me and the power of His presence in these children and people really ministered to me.
I'm glad that we did go to Pemba, even though we were only there a few days, all the people I got to know were such a blessing and God challenged and grew me in alot of ways while I was there.
The next day we mostly just spent time with the children at Maputo until we had to pack and leave. It was a long flight back for me. I didn't realize exactly how hard it would be for me to leave Africa. Multiple times on the trip back to Canada, I'd be reminded of something in Africa, and it'd bring me to tears.

I really enjoyed being with the Mozambican people. Often times, when we were asked to share at different places, I felt really inadequate. They were teaching me so much, yet they wanted to hear what I could share with them. I really felt like I had nothing to give. They have so little, yet they worship God with utter abandon and joy. Praising Him amidst their hardships and sufferings. Taking time for God and others, and finding things to be thankful for in their struggles. Yet, my culture is so self-pleasing and self-centered. We have so many things that it takes time to maintain all those things, and then we work harder to pay off the things so we can buy more things, and we're constantly trying to get something better and bigger so that we will somehow, through these things, become more distinguished and feel better about ourselves. And we're so busy with all these things, that we don't have much time for God or friends. Most Africans don't have these things, they just have their family, friends, and God. It pains me to see how our culture so often tends to ignore this very important part of life and it also helped me to appreciate this about Africans. I pray that we would be able to grasp the truths that they have found and that we'd take time out of our busy schedules for God and put Him first in our lives. It's when we do that, that we will hear Him clearly and see Him move in our nation. I desire to see our children worship Him with the passion and abandon that I saw the children worshiping God. They are hungry (in the natural), and this hunger transfers to the spiritual realm - they are hungry for God, and it shows. And God is able to reveal Himself in a strong way and His presence is so tangible. It's when we are hungry for God that He shows Himself strong. It's when we cry out for Him and desire to see His face that He shows us His heart. It's when we allow the things that break His heart to break ours that He pours His beautiful Love into us until we overflow. I pray that we would seek Him and that we would allow the hurts and pressures of this world to press us closer to Him till we become one with Him.

It seems that in this 2 week time period, God has etched a passion and love in my heart - that is in the shape of Africa. It may only be that I am supposed go back for a short time-period, but it could also be that God is calling me to serve in Africa for the remainder of my days on this earth - I really don't know. I knew that God would change my perspective while I was in Africa, but I didn't think that I would be this changed. I'm just taking it one step at a time, and God will continue to guide me. He has led me this far, I know I can trust Him to lead me into the destiny He has for me. A few weeks ago, I was wondering what I would be doing and where I would live in Canada - now I'm wondering what continent I will be living on. Alot can change in a couple weeks, eh?

My Adventures - Mozambique Mission Trip 2009 (pt. 3)

Just to give you a little information about Mozambique and Iris Ministries:

Mozambique is one of the poorest nations on earth. The statistics are shocking: Average life expectancy - 35 years. Unemployment - 90%. Orphans - one million. Children that die daily from water and sanitation-related diseases - 5,000.
Zimpeto Children's Centre, established by Rolland and Heidi Baker of Iris Ministries, is on the outskirts of Maputo, the capital city of Mozambique. The Centre cares for over 300 children, with 130 Mozambican workers and 40 long-term missionaries in residence. There is a free health clinic, primary school (with 800 enrolled students), food aid program, nursing mothers' assistance, and a reintegration program which aims to reunite children with their families wherever possible.

Our first day at Iris Ministries was spent just hanging out with the children and playing with the babies. I was able to spend a few hours in the Nursery and visit with the ladies there. Even though we couldn't talk alot to each other, we were able to communicate with gestures, they even taught me a little Portuguese.

The baby house has about 30 children under the age of 4. When you step into the playing area, you are almost immediately surrounded by children wanting your attention and wanting to be held, some tug on your pant leg and say in Portuguese, "Look at me, look at me!!" and then they do something silly or grab a toy to show you. I felt a little overwhelmed at first, because I wanted to hold them all and show each one that they are special and I didn't favor one over the other. But that's hard, because as soon as you pick up one or two, the others are jealous. Of course, as you are there longer, you can give attention to a few more, but it's almost impossible to hold or play with 30 toddlers at once. But God reminded me of the "stop for the one" thing that Heidi said in her book, and that's what I did, I looked at one child at a time and just loved them. I felt so full of love for these children and I just wanted them all to know how much they are loved and wanted. (obviously they are getting alot of love there too, because we saw a few before/after pictures of the children - it's amazing how much they've blossomed at Iris!)

After having lunch with all the children (including those that go to the school), we went to Machava Children's Center, which was about an hour's drive from the Zimpeto Center. It too, was a beautiful center. We were shown around the base and met a few people, then they had their church service and we (the team) shared a few words with the people. After the service, I had the opportunity to take a few pictures of some children. (On this trip I didn't get to take as many pictures as I would've liked to because either it was too dangerous or just not respectful of the locals.)

After the first day, time seemed to just fly by. Our team did alot of ministry to the long-term staff and missionaries while we were on the base. God did alot of stretching in me there too. I've never done prophecy for others before. Our team was in the prayer room with one or two missionaries at a time and we were listening to what God was saying for this person, not if He had something to say. I didn't want to go, I was kinda complaining to God and saying that I didn't want to go, because I probably wouldn't hear anything He was saying anyways. But He reminded me, "When you are weak, then I am strong." So, I kinda reluctantly said, fine I'll go. I trust that You'll help me, 'cause I'm not strong in this area. And God totally did speak, well, more like I heard Him. And sometimes I'd get one or two words for the people or sometimes I'd see a picture - it was really neat. This really boosted my faith and I became more confident in God and trusting Him. Although, when the opportunity to go to the hospital ministry came up at Zimpeto, I didn't go - for 2 reasons - I really just wanted to spend some time with the girls, and I was kinda scared to go to the hospital. Honestly, I hate hospitals here in Canada, never mind one in a third-world country. So I stayed back and just hung out with the girls - and I was glad I did. I had a good time getting to know them.

The first outreach we did was the Bocaria (Dump). I wasn't exactly sure what to expect when we got there, and if I would be able to handle the sights and smells. I'm just going to take an excerpt from my journal from this day to give you a picture of what it was like:

"This morning, we went to the Bocaria to minister to the people there. We took the covered truck with 13 of us volunteers riding in the back. When we got to the dump, we drove down into a sort of valley that separated the homes from the dump, there was also the building that served as their church. (I later learned that the homes were all built by Iris Ministries) The church had bamboo walls, metal roof, and a dirt/sand floor. When we arrived, there were about 5 or 6 ladies singing and praying and about 4 or 5 children. I sat with 3 of the children while we prayed before we split up. Then we split our team in half - one would go to the bocaria area to pray for them and invite them to church and one would go to the houses to pray for the ladies and the sick. I went to the bocaria. What I saw totally tugged at my heart and I felt such compassion for these people. They were picking through the garbage - some more desperate than others. Some were eating whatever half-rotten fruit or food they could find. There were some areas on the dump that were soggy to step on, and some areas that were smoldering. We prayed for people from old to young, and then went back to the church. While we were on the dump, at one point, I just looked around in amazement at where I was - in the middle of a stinky, filthy, grimy, messy pile of rubbish, yet it didn't bother me. I didn't care that it was dirty, I didn't have reactions to the smoke or wretch at touching the garbage. I had such compassion for these lowest-of-the-lows that none of those things mattered. Praying for them and just being there with them was such a blessing.
The church was packed with children and adults. We worshiped some more (I was, once again, with some children) then the team got up to share. After the service, we handed out bread to everyone and headed off in our truck, this time with 17 people and 3 babies in the back. (and we thought 13 was squishy!!)"

The next day, we went to a market in Maputo. I quite enjoyed the experience. After, we were taken to an Italian restaurant in the Maputo Mall. It felt very weird going from the dump the previous day to riding on escalators in a big, fancy mall. We were all quite pensive on our way to the restaurant. I had Pineapple Fanta for the first time at the restaurant - it was really good.

My Adventures - Mozambique Mission Trip 2009 (pt. 2)

We had a 8 hour flight to London, England (where we had our first stop-over). Once everything was set in place for our next flight, we only had a few hours to do something if we ventured out of the airport, but decided we'd rather see London for a few hours then just sit in the airport. So, we set out on our first adventure into the City of London - took the 'tube' to the downtown area and got to see Big Ben, Churchill Square, St. James Park, and Buckingham Palace. We didn't get to spend much time at each place as we only had about 1 1/2 hours, but I'm very thankful that we did get the opportunity to see them. (Oh, and I must add that it was sunny when we were there - which is quite a rare thing this time of year in England, I think.)

Seventeen hours and 2 more stop-overs (Portugal and Johannesburg) later, we arrived in Maputo, Mozambique. It was blissfully warm and sunny. We did not have many problems going though customs and security (I'm sure we would've had more if it wasn't for the young man who helped us all the way through - I'm not sure, but he could've been an angel, because what he did was uncharacteristic for a staff member at the airport.) He helped us fill out all our forms, butted us in front of the line for customs, and talked the security lady out of looking through all our bags and charging us (we were bringing items to Iris Ministries for the children - soccer balls, toy medals, etc. and she was probably concerned that we were going to sell them). He walked outside to the area where Iris MInistries was picking us up, and then just walked away - he didn't even wait around for a tip! (which we were quite dissapointed about)
On the drive to the base, we were well introduced to Mozambican driving (I presume it's how much of the world experiences driving) They drive on the left side of the road, and what we may consider 'tail-gating' here in Canada is commonplace there. When we would consider it 'unsafe' to pass, they just whip right out there, almost grazing the oncoming vehicle as they return to their lane. It is normal for people, motorbikes and bicyles to line the sides of the roads, even for children to be playing but a few yards away from fast-moving vehicles.

The common minibuses (or chapas) of Mozambique (one of the most prevalent methods of commuting for the people of Africa) are often filled way over the capacity they were meant to carry and sometimes you will see one so full that it's comical. I think that it would take North Americans a while to adjust if we had to commute to and from work in that condition every day, but these people don't seem to mind - they are just happy to have a job or school to be going to.